Mad Iguana

Ha, Kaz! Have you snuck into my house and been reading over my shoulder? That’s pretty much where I’d got to – thanks in no small part to this thread. I was avoiding the scene and the complicated POV didn’t help. However I think, by making it somehow trigger a flashback to the earlier scene where she is beaten up by her husband and making her feel…[Read more]

Richard, that is truly a shocking piece of writing – awful to read but really well done. Very powerful. It doesn’t feel gratuitous to me, awful as it is.

Jane, I think I know the scene you’re referring to 😉 Reading through this thread and going back to my own comments to you, the issue I had with it was that it felt as if you were avoiding the…[Read more]

Jane, you are welcome to read it. I’m in the throes of revising it after laying it aside for three years, so a fresh perspective will be useful.

And Philippa, I’m just trying to collect my thoughts to DM you…

I’d love to read the whole thing, Richard, if you’re ever looking for someone else to look at it.

Oops. Sorry!

Aargh, spoiler!

By the way, you might like to know that Rosalind doesn’t lose the baby. She’s only a month or two into her pregnancy.

I had to read this a few times, Richard, to get beyond the awfulness of it. You were right to post it with a warning.
It’s a very strong piece of writing and – this is meant as a compliment – I’m glad I had a go at my own scene before reading it, because I would have found it difficult to write in my own voice afterwards! Yes, I see how you’ve…[Read more]

Okay, Jane, here is my violent passage. I’ve left in a bit on the front to put it in context. Two words in your ear:

1) Just to explain any weirdness, this is a ghost story.
2) In addition to the violence, contains sex and a little naughty language.

Okay, here we go.

Smiling down into his face, she began to pump her hips. Joey came to meet…[Read more]

It was so lovely to catch up with you @giselle 😊😊 Thank you for cheering me on. Hope the edits are going well xx

Anyone read any Galley Beggar Press Books?

Well, clarifying the problem is always a good start! Yes, I can see better now what’s making it tricky. I guess the same principles still apply: focus on your onlooker’s reactions to what they are witnessing, rather that (just) the action itself. Maybe think about the onlooker experiencing the violence as a series of sounds, movements, colours,…[Read more]

Shame Derby is a bit too far for me for a weekday evening 🙁

I agree that sex scenes like violent scenes that develop the characters or characterisation shouldn’t be shy away from. I think the main issues with those kind of scenes is when they turn into the mechanics of what goes where and who does what. The scenes I have read where it have really works were when the reader is in the head of the character,…[Read more]