Terrie

Aargh, spoiler!

Two bits of advice ‘freed’ me up wrt location, because I usually start with somewhere I know then make adjustments as necessary. Reading a disclaimer along the lines of “geographical liberties have been taken” I much appreciated.
Also, Eimear McBride said when she wrote of Camden, she did it from a 5 year old memory of the place and never…[Read more]

“if it doesn’t advance the plot or reveal something about character, don’t prolong it.” – excellent advice! Thanks Jane.

For severe violence done well I’d look at Malcolm Mackay, Ray Banks, Stuart Neville’s ‘The Twelve’. Benjamin Myers ‘Turning Blue’ had me commenting ‘Stomach-churning details precisely told’, or Sarah Hilary. Denise Mina might be good, but I cannot remember which is the most violent.

I think you’ve just answered your own question. 😀 Good luck with developing it.

I’m with you and Sandra on not going graphic. Ramping up the PD and inferring what’s going on rather than full on graphic is definitely my preferred route. BUT, don’t ignore feedback either. What percentage of your Beta readers had this reaction? Could you ask the ones who didn’t mention this how they felt. It may be you’re being too short and…[Read more]

I’d agree with you Jane, ‘less is more’ works for violent scenes much as it does for sex scenes, though I suppose you’d have to work harder so as to bring something fresh for the readers’ mind to work on.
Those long, graphic scenes can be effective, up to a point but can tun as many off as they do on, so go with your gut feeling.

Earth and smoke and iron

It were an odd one and no mistake. She were odd. Educated; not from round here. ‘Otherworldly’ some might say.
She lugged it in, wrapped up in brown paper, tied with string. Knots sealed with blobs of scarlet wax.
‘You’ll ‘after tell me what’s in it, lass –‘
‘A coat. An army one. That’s what’s the smell –‘
I sniffed. A…[Read more]

@Stevie – definitely sounds worth a shot

@alanr – no idea but thought it might warrant further exploration (and we may even have some US based people here anyway)

Great writing Seagreen. I thought it was a winner as soon as I read it. Super competition Daeds and what a great effort with all the feedback!

I’m in Loughborough – I wouldn’t call it quaint or pretty…like any town, there are bits like that, but not in the town centre. I suppose it depends on where most of the action happens…

Not sure where you’re based, Philippa, but happy to show you round if you want to see it!

Nice prompt… Looking forward to getting my teeth stuck into this one.

Thanks, Daeds, a valid point and I appreciate the input.

Thanks John. Mostly I meant that you make us feel what it was like so well, the few places where you just tell us something directly stood out – e.g. ‘but the loss of his attendance bonus would have been intolerable’ – I would have preferred a sense of what intolerable meant to them. But it’s a seriously picky point for such a short word count…[Read more]