Libby

I had a sticky scene that wasn’t working Squidge, and after some time away from it I reread and thought D’oh, of course she wouldn’t react like that. She’d be angry. It’s funny how the characters become real people in our heads.

Thanks for the heads up about Kingstone. I shall go take a look.

I did a bit of googling and everybody says something different. Apparently in 2014 there were more first person than third, so I guess it just varies.

I shall attempt to find more subtle ways of placing my characters, as you suggested. Thanks for all the help. I’ll keep it all in mind as I go in for the next round of edits.

That’s a really good point Sea. I took a look at my MG books and they’re all third person! Thanks for the Jess Butterworth one – I shall take a look. I’ll also try and do some investigating into first/third. (And possibly have a cry over my keyboard at the thought of rewriting into third. :D)

Thanks @seagreen, this is all great. I’ll have a think about the save the cat moment and ramp up the fear a bit as a few people have mentioned that. I’ll weed out some of the description as well.

Re the being in the character’s head, and the explanations like ‘standing next to me’, I think you’ve cut to the heart of my question re YA vs MG…[Read more]

Thanks @bella – it was fun to write.

Perfect @squidge, that’s great to know it’s about right. I was worrying it was a bit densely packed but maybe I just have to be careful of too heavy descriptions. I shall tweak as suggested.

Ps posting this at the airport. Has anyone been to Seville? Any recommendations as to things to do?

Just noticed that I forgot to take the numbers off my comments. They mean nothing. I got my OH to print the stories off with nothing to identify them and number them so I would judge them blind. Except for Ath who posted so late he missed the process.

Well done Libby, excellent. Good job, Jane.

Great entry, Libby and a very well deserved win.
Jane – another great competition. Thanks.

Thank you everyone. And sorry for the delay. We’re away for a few days from tomorrow and I had quite a few things that had to be done before we went.

A cracking bunch of entries. I hope you enjoyed writing these as much as I enjoyed reading them. As usual I was struck by the many different ways they all responded to the theme.

1) @johnalty. I…[Read more]

Thank you all! I am looking forward to readying them. I am out most of today so results will be posted this evening.

‘You don’t have a future, not really,’ said Gregor. He shifted his bones on the stone floor making his chains rattle.

‘Ah,’ said the philosopher, at length, ‘you’re one of those Zenonians. A Stoic I suppose. You imagine that because we can never sufficiently divide the instant we call the present, then it must be an illusion, as is the future. A…[Read more]