HELEN KAMPFNER

Yep, that was the thinking. The rest of it is quite close 3rd person, so it’s sort of cheating to know that she’s going to succeed this time. But, that presupposes something (on my part) about the rest of the book and the audience, I think.

Oh I see! Sort of a ‘how much longer is she going to keep trying this?’ vibe?

That’s very true, Squidge. TBH, I’d say I’d re-write it about fifty times before I got anywhere and then probably end up with the first version in the end.
I think, given your focus, your approach is accurate. What I was trying to do was remove the certainty of her having succeeded on the 27th go.

Make time for day-dreaming. Fifteen minutes of doing nothing, except thinking about a particular scene, can help you visualise better.
Atmospheric music helps. As does wine. Or gin.
Okay, maybe not gin.

Thanks Kate, Mad.

Actually, I reckon your way would work too, Mad. I suppose it depends what it is you’re trying to emphasise in the opener – for me, it was the fact that Tilda’s been trying to get this bloomin’ illuminorb right for so long, whereas depending on how you worded the next bit, your suggestion might focus attention on Silviu and his…[Read more]

Ta, Jules. I’m working on the theory that this quilt can be reversible, in that the visible spirals on the ‘back’ are just as lovely as the mixed coloured stripes on the ‘front’. A lot still to do though.

It’s great, Squidge! My personal taste would have been to start with:
“By Tilda’s twenty-sixth attempt to produce an illuminorb, Silviu’s patience…”
But I can’t say that would be better (in fact, it’s grammatically very awkward… so probably worse); it’s just how I would have done it. Otherwise, a cracking piece with a ton of world-building and…[Read more]

Just noticed that people may not realise that by “I” in the post above, I mean the “@denofwriters” twitter account, which I’m currently curating.
I don’t mean my own personal twitter account, which tends to be less polite and helpful.

Lovely blog, Squidge. And your quilting is very impressive. What an amazing colour!

Apologies for the formatting! That’ll teach me to cut and paste…

Hi Elle,

I remember you talking about this story, and I really like it. A very clever twist on the oldest of tales.

I think you set things up well: we are expecting her to be the victim, but it shifts dramatically and she becomes the predator, turning the tables with her newly-discovered sexual power. Your writing, descriptions etc. as always,…[Read more]