Squidge

Earth and smoke and iron

It were an odd one and no mistake. She were odd. Educated; not from round here. ‘Otherworldly’ some might say.
She lugged it in, wrapped up in brown paper, tied with string. Knots sealed with blobs of scarlet wax.
‘You’ll ‘after tell me what’s in it, lass –‘
‘A coat. An army one. That’s what’s the smell –‘
I sniffed. A…[Read more]

Forgot to check in on this – A totally deserved win, @seagreen! 🙂

@Stevie – definitely sounds worth a shot

@alanr – no idea but thought it might warrant further exploration (and we may even have some US based people here anyway)

Great writing Seagreen. I thought it was a winner as soon as I read it. Super competition Daeds and what a great effort with all the feedback!

Hi @alanr,

Great! That makes sense. I think all of the points you make about how the manananggal operates within Galina could be turned into a great hook in your blurb, while also satisfactorily answering the agent’s burning question of ‘how does this possession thing work?’

A final couple of super-picky points.

I would be wary of ‘selling’…[Read more]

Thanks guys, and sorry for my slow reply (I am currently on a canal boat!)

These are all extremely helpful ideas, great brainstorming. I am going to take some time to digest it all and see what speaks to me.

I do like the idea of a fairly “quaint” or “middle class pretty” town which contrasts with the trauma of abduction. Also the theme (which…[Read more]

Seagreen, what a juicy idea. I will try on paper and see where it leads. I haven’t written anything for years.

A super piece of writing. Gave me goose bumps. Well done Seagreen.

Thanks John. Mostly I meant that you make us feel what it was like so well, the few places where you just tell us something directly stood out – e.g. ‘but the loss of his attendance bonus would have been intolerable’ – I would have preferred a sense of what intolerable meant to them. But it’s a seriously picky point for such a short word count…[Read more]

Congrats to Seagreen – very well done! And thank you Daeds for running and also for the feedback. Very helpful – so thank you again 🙂

Absolutely delighted for you Janette -thoroughly deserved of course

Well done, Janette – that’s wonderful news!

The online version of my story is now ready to view. Here is the link if you’d like to take a look:
2018 DG Comp – First Place

Well done, Sea 🙂 A very well deserved win. And thanks Daed for getting the ball rolling. Great monthly comp.

Ah, Daeds, you’re too generous. I didn’t expect that, and have, in fact, been checking the Den frequently today to find out what the theme for this month’s comp would be 🙂

I’m delighted, of course, given the calibre of the entries, but hope no-one expects that same level of insight when it comes to October’s judging.

Off to think of something to set…

I just amended the post to tag people, which I’d forgotten to do before. I hope people get notifications of tags when it’s an edited post? Oh well, we’ll find out