Sophie Jonas-Hill

To explain my changes:

Para 1: what kind of book
You sound a bit waffly on genre. I’ve tried to make it more specific, avoid the term ‘borderline literary’, and simply give your nice elevator pitch upfront. I think your setting is a real USP so I’ve got that in upfront too.

I fear an agent will freak at your word count! Books above 100k words…[Read more]

Hi @alanr,

Ooo, thanks for sharing! I like the sound of these supernatural elements, and the interplay between your three main characters. I was just thinking today about then book “Ice” by Anna Kavan. I think yours has similarities to this too.

Okay, I’ve dived straight in and edited, as I see fit. Feel free to disagree with any or all of my…[Read more]

Nice one! What is your book about?? Don’t think you’ve told me yet.

Not sure it was mine you read. No tube crash in mine (just a tube crush). only started it in 2015 too. I wonder whose story it was!

Thanks for flagging this, @sandradavies

Incidentally, despite the call to arms for subs from female writers, @pinkbelt75 I wonder if you’ve considered these guys for your crime novel(s)?

Hi @alanr,

Nice typo spot! Man, there’s always one (or 12).

Yes, this is the novel I’ve now rewritten in dual POV. The original version I was peddling here was too much of a coming-of-age story and (in Sarah’s words) “not twisty enough”. Cue complete rewrite!

Though, as I’ve mentioned before, the suggested changes simply helped me get it…[Read more]

Interesting perspective, Andrew. It seems to me that an awful lot of ‘failure’ is not necessarily a failure in the writing, but a failure to direct the writing to the best audience – whether it be a competition, a magazine, an anthology (in short story terms), or an agent, a publisher or competition etc in novel terms. And a lot of that is down to…[Read more]

Sure! You are welcome to email the MS over to me (do you have my email?)

Let me know if you have any specific questions and / or any specific bits you are concerned about.

It’s so heartening that people in the industry are taking this seriously now. And good though it is that there are paid-for courses available, for someone with the knowledge and experience to offer a checking and advice service free of charge is really brilliant.

Wondering if you might be up for ploughing through a 150k m/s loaded with PTSD etc?…

‘Failure’, like ‘rejection’ is such an emotive word. Whether or not you feel you’ve failed may depend on what you set out to do. Did you set out to win? Well, I suppose in terms of entering comps, we do set out to win/be placed. But I would not say it’s a failure if that doesn’t happen. Is it failure if you’re not ‘satisfied’ with your…[Read more]

Oh yeah! That looks great. I know writer and Clinical Psychologist Stephanie Hutton has also now started running some similar courses herself. Great stuff!