Friends – Activity – Hilary

KazG replied to the topic Lost my group! in the forum Andrew Wille's DIY MA course 6 years, 5 months ago

The Den is eating its private groups! I wonder why…
Athelstone replied to the topic Lost my group! in the forum Andrew Wille's DIY MA course 6 years, 5 months ago

Yep – me too.

Also, I had a private hidden group to mess about with text formatting that seems to have disappeared.
KazG started the topic Lost my group! in the forum Andrew Wille's DIY MA course 6 years, 5 months ago

Hi fellow DIY-ers! I seem to have lost my group – it’s not showing up in my groups at all anymore. The only way I can get here is to look at my notifications and activity and get in that way. Is anyone else having this problem?
Kate replied to the topic Mid grade 1st chapter in the forum Critiques 6 years, 5 months ago

Thanks @bella – it was fun to write.

Perfect @squidge, that’s great to know it’s about right. I was worrying it was a bit densely packed but maybe I just have to be careful of too heavy descriptions. I shall tweak as suggested.
Squidge replied to the topic Mid grade 1st chapter in the forum Critiques 6 years, 5 months ago

Hi Kate, it’s pitched about right, I think.

I wondered about the amount of description initially – and where it just touches on backstory/info dump when your MC says she’s never been there before. Can you rework something along the lines of ‘In all my sneaking around, I’d never managed to see inside, and I wasn’t disappointed on this, my first…[Read more]
Bella replied to the topic Mid grade 1st chapter in the forum Critiques 6 years, 5 months ago

I have no experience of writing MG, and it is a loooooong time since I was aged between 8 and 12 (that’s the MG target, right?) but I would say you are slap bang on the money. I’d certainly have gone for this at that age. It’s great fun.
Bella replied to the topic Class 3 Writing Exercise “I don’t remember” – Hilary in the forum Andrew Wille's DIY MA course 6 years, 5 months ago

Oh, this packs a punch. The add-on sentences say so much, and the voice is great.
Kate started the topic Mid grade 1st chapter in the forum Critiques 6 years, 5 months ago

I’ve got a draft of what is meant to be an upper mid grade novel, but I have concerns I’ve written it in a too Young Adult style. I’m specifically looking for feedback from experienced MG writers on whether I need to adjust the language/structure, and how I might go about it.

All other comments also welcome.
Many thanks.

(As usual the…[Read more]
KazG replied to the topic Class 3 Writing Exercise “I don’t remember” – Hilary in the forum Andrew Wille's DIY MA course 6 years, 5 months ago

Wow, this is so rich @hilary. So much there, so many hints and glimpses and twinges of pain and longing and sadness. There’s a sort of yearning behind of these lines that breaks my heart a bit. Such powerful fragments.
Kate posted an update 6 years, 5 months ago

Are there any mid grade writers on the Den that would be willing to take a look at the first chapter of my MG book? Someone suggested I was using a YA style that might not be appropriate and I can see what they mean. I’d like thoughts on language and structure relating to MG books before embarking on the next edit.
I’ll post it up in crit for…[Read more]
- Seagreen replied 6 years, 5 months ago
  
  Hi Kate,
  Just noticed this. If you post it, I’m read it but not sure how much help I’ll be.
  - Seagreen replied 6 years, 5 months ago
    
    *I’ll*
    - Kate replied 6 years, 5 months ago
      
      Thanks @seagreen. I’ll post it up tomorrow.
Athelstone replied to the topic Monthly competition – January 2020 in the forum Monthly Competition 6 years, 5 months ago

I spent a day in Seville. I recommend a) don’t drive; it’s considerably more insane than Paris and that’s bad enough b) wear a surgical mask or take oxygen; the air reminded me of London circa 1973 only much, much, worse c) we liked the Plaza de España and the Cathedral, but honestly there’s so much. We were almost persuaded to visit the site of…[Read more]
- JaneShuff replied 6 years, 5 months ago
  
  Thank Ath. Going to the cathedral and the palaces tomorrow and spent the day wandering around including seeing students doing Flamenco at Plaza Espana. Fabulous. It is all fabulous for folks like us who live in a little breton coastal backwater although you are right about the air. Did you see my post last week about failing to get enouh done in…[Read more]
JaneShuff replied to the topic Monthly competition – January 2020 in the forum Monthly Competition 6 years, 5 months ago

Ps posting this at the airport. Has anyone been to Seville? Any recommendations as to things to do?
JaneShuff replied to the topic Monthly competition – January 2020 in the forum Monthly Competition 6 years, 5 months ago

Just noticed that I forgot to take the numbers off my comments. They mean nothing. I got my OH to print the stories off with nothing to identify them and number them so I would judge them blind. Except for Ath who posted so late he missed the process.
Raine replied to the topic Monthly competition – January 2020 in the forum Monthly Competition 6 years, 5 months ago

Ooh congrats @libby on a very deserving perfectly formed story! 😊 And thank you @janeshuff for a challenge that got me away from editing/fretting! X
Seagreen replied to the topic Monthly competition – January 2020 in the forum Monthly Competition 6 years, 5 months ago

Congratulations, Libby! 🙂
And thanks, Jane, for kick-starting my writing year x
John S Alty replied to the topic Monthly competition – January 2020 in the forum Monthly Competition 6 years, 5 months ago

Well done Libby, excellent. Good job, Jane.
Athelstone replied to the topic Monthly competition – January 2020 in the forum Monthly Competition 6 years, 5 months ago

Great entry, Libby and a very well deserved win.
Jane – another great competition. Thanks.
Sandra replied to the topic Monthly competition – January 2020 in the forum Monthly Competition 6 years, 5 months ago

Very well done, Libby – such a strong and individual tale (as were they all) and thank you Jane for the prompting and the comments.
Janette replied to the topic Monthly competition – January 2020 in the forum Monthly Competition 6 years, 5 months ago

Congratulations Libby; well deserved. And thank you @janeshuff for a challenge well set.
JaneShuff replied to the topic Monthly competition – January 2020 in the forum Monthly Competition 6 years, 5 months ago

Thank you everyone. And sorry for the delay. We’re away for a few days from tomorrow and I had quite a few things that had to be done before we went.

A cracking bunch of entries. I hope you enjoyed writing these as much as I enjoyed reading them. As usual I was struck by the many different ways they all responded to the theme.

1) @johnalty. I…[Read more]
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