Daedalus

Excellent. Will use these. If you have a twitter handle, I’ll credit ye – otherwise anonymity will have to suffice.

Thank you @Daedalus — I’m glad you enjoyed it!

Thanks Philippa, that’s really useful especially your feedback about the scene after the big turning point, I can see how it can feel flat compared to what’s just before so I’m reworking it making it shorter and more to the point.

Also I’ll try to work it some more “wolf” reference about Jezza, maybe referring to him as the leader of the pack or…[Read more]

The easiest way to protect your writing from unwanted attention is to set up a private group. Explain what it’s about in the description and then people can ask to join or you can invite them.

That’s one reason why the writing challenge group A Room with a View will be changed to a private group as soon as writing begins.

If you are really…[Read more]

Hi Den Admins! Great job thus far. One question: is there any way / are there plans afoot to have a password protected section for critiques? Some places get a bit funny about first rights, as I understand it, and I just like to have things free from search engines. Cheers

I love the fact that we get to have input to your books! It’s quite the privilege, actually. Just had to say that hehe.

Anyway, enough with the gushing :o) Love the opening. Illuminorbs sound amazing. One thing I would think about though is the exclamation mark after “This was so frustrating!” Maybe make Tilda do something to vent that feeling -…[Read more]

Starting with a sentence that gives away what is going to happen is something I do a lot myself. There is a stage in my editing process where I go through the MS and look for them and mainly remove or change them. I think they are sort of notes to myself that need to come out.

When writing that painful 1st draft always remember Hemingway wise words: “The first draft of anything is shit.”

One of my favourite (quotable) bits of writing advice is from Geoff Dyer: “Have regrets. They are fuel. On the page they flare into desire.” I love that.

Choose ring bound notebooks to scribble ideas in; you’ll never lose your pen if you keep one clipped down the inside of the rings…

Jane – yes, this is the start of number 2…

Will have a think about the success bit… If two peeps think it, you might well have a point. 😉

Is this the opening to number two? It works really well whether you’ve read the first or not. Straight into the action and letting us know about Tilda and her situation without us feeling we are being told. I am inclined to agree with Mad about not giving away that she will succeed in creating an illuminorb in the opening sentence.

Yep, that was the thinking. The rest of it is quite close 3rd person, so it’s sort of cheating to know that she’s going to succeed this time. But, that presupposes something (on my part) about the rest of the book and the audience, I think.

Oh I see! Sort of a ‘how much longer is she going to keep trying this?’ vibe?

That’s very true, Squidge. TBH, I’d say I’d re-write it about fifty times before I got anywhere and then probably end up with the first version in the end.
I think, given your focus, your approach is accurate. What I was trying to do was remove the certainty of her having succeeded on the 27th go.

Make time for day-dreaming. Fifteen minutes of doing nothing, except thinking about a particular scene, can help you visualise better.
Atmospheric music helps. As does wine. Or gin.
Okay, maybe not gin.

Thanks Kate, Mad.

Actually, I reckon your way would work too, Mad. I suppose it depends what it is you’re trying to emphasise in the opener – for me, it was the fact that Tilda’s been trying to get this bloomin’ illuminorb right for so long, whereas depending on how you worded the next bit, your suggestion might focus attention on Silviu and his…[Read more]

Ta, Jules. I’m working on the theory that this quilt can be reversible, in that the visible spirals on the ‘back’ are just as lovely as the mixed coloured stripes on the ‘front’. A lot still to do though.