Mezz

Road to Redemption

It was the hour before dawn on Christmas morning. Robert stood under a pair of bay trees at the far end of the garden and breathed deeply, calming himself. The darkest hour it’s sometimes called, but he could see the light was coming fast now, a sliver of red showing on the eastern horizon and he knew he’d have to hurry. Sho…[Read more]

I came across this piece of writing advice by Sol Stein which appeals to me:

“….be sure you don’t stop the story while describing. You are a storyteller, not an interior decorator.”

Probably a shot across the bows of so-called literary prose. King likes to emphasize this point too, but doesn’t do it quite as succinctly.

Well done, Raine.

Amazing news! Congrats!!

Editing
“Listen to me, Luigi; we’re always on the lookout for new stage plays and this one sounded interesting. Ingenious plot, bit of sex, incest, prostitution, a potential murder and ending up with a suicide.” He put down the cigar he had been waving like a conductor’s baton and folded his hands on his expansive belly. “What’s not to like?”
“…[Read more]

RL = Real Life

Well done, Daeds, a star is born!

I’ve never started a piece of fiction knowing the ending. I like to start with a scene, put a character into it, and see where it goes. I enjoy the ride.

Well done Alan! Congratulations!
All three courses sound excellent.

Hi L,

I think you could trim most of the paragraphs in the first half of the story, really. The Physics thing (tight pants) early on could go, you use this analogy later on anyway. Watching a film at the cinema, that paragraph could be less wordy I think.
And towards the end – “zipped her hoodie and pulled the hood over her head” etc. I know…[Read more]

I think “Spotting an opening…” needs a new para. The lipstick thing is a little over complicated, I think you could shorten it without losing anything.
The “pills like skittles” analogy doesn’t work for me.
“Small-to-medium-time” seems a cop-out, he’s a small-time crook, I think.
“Anticipated to sit..” should be “anticipated sitting”.

I’d take…[Read more]

The Banjo
The phone rings in the lost property office at Euston Station in London.
“Lost Property, Smith speaking, how may we help?”
He takes a sip from his tea, listens.
“Yes, sir, anything left on a train on this line ends up here. Assuming it’s turned in, like. What have you lost?
“So, a banjo is it sir? Well let me have a look, won’t be…[Read more]

Well done, good job as usual, L!