Terrie

Raine, as you know, I’m a lazy, non-analytical reader, so you’re getting facile first impressions from me – and thanks for ‘stochastic’ – but I thought this a really enticing beginning, launching lots of characters, all of whom promised interest, tension and above averagely intelligent entertainment.

Brilliant, well done John. Please put a link in the Podium when it’s published? You’re on a bit of a roll, there

Thanks everyone who contributed. A name change from Florence to Felicity, to avoid confusion with a hurricane of that name, a couple more edits and it was picked up by Across The Margin. Should be out in the next week or so. Now titled Felicity’s First.

Personally I like it. The narrator-y bits make the transitions into a sort of PD slide. If you’re going to introduce a range of geographically dispersed characters in a short piece of text, this seems like a good way to do it. And I like the voice

‘This was a Sunday, the day it began was a Thursday’ – comma splice?

‘Domain’ – Demain? (French for…[Read more]

Impact

The EVA suit’s read-out flashed Warning! Oxygen levels at 18% in eerie red. Jepson’s mind was foggy, irrational. All her training hadn’t prepared her for the reality of being stuffed into a damaged evacuation tube and launched into the airless void.

It had begun with impact. Many in fact, although Jepson only counted three as notew…[Read more]

Ta, Jonathan. ‘couple of tiny wibbles’… I can live with that. 😉

But now, three log-ins later, it works normally.

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