Martini Rosso

Well done, Daeds, a star is born!

I’ve never started a piece of fiction knowing the ending. I like to start with a scene, put a character into it, and see where it goes. I enjoy the ride.

Hi L,

I think you could trim most of the paragraphs in the first half of the story, really. The Physics thing (tight pants) early on could go, you use this analogy later on anyway. Watching a film at the cinema, that paragraph could be less wordy I think.
And towards the end – “zipped her hoodie and pulled the hood over her head” etc. I know…[Read more]

I think “Spotting an opening…” needs a new para. The lipstick thing is a little over complicated, I think you could shorten it without losing anything.
The “pills like skittles” analogy doesn’t work for me.
“Small-to-medium-time” seems a cop-out, he’s a small-time crook, I think.
“Anticipated to sit..” should be “anticipated sitting”.

I’d take…[Read more]

Thanks for your notes, Raine. They are very helpful and come at a timely moment as I polish the structure of my novel in progress.

A few immediate thoughts which may not stand up to scrutiny. Athelstone wonders about the universality of such frameworks. This has always been my question too. They seem to me too rigid to allow for individual…[Read more]

This is great Raine. I’ve read a few structure books and I can see how they all reflect in this arc. It’s nice to have it in this concise summary. I’m going to print it out and pin it to the wall!

The Banjo
The phone rings in the lost property office at Euston Station in London.
“Lost Property, Smith speaking, how may we help?”
He takes a sip from his tea, listens.
“Yes, sir, anything left on a train on this line ends up here. Assuming it’s turned in, like. What have you lost?
“So, a banjo is it sir? Well let me have a look, won’t be…[Read more]

Well done, good job as usual, L!

It’s not my cup of tea but I’m supportive of anyone who does it. I know someone who sets her own word count for the month and that works well for her.